Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-7230018-20150413005920

Nobody knows it, but I have a job. Before that jacka** kidnapped me.


 * Audience laughs*

No wait, I still have it. One day, after I killed those kids, a man who I can't say his name of came to me.

"Leeeeeeeeee... Leeeeeeeeee..."


 * The audience laughs*

It's God.

"Oh God, too much XXX."


 * The audience laughs*

"Yes, I am God."

"GO AWAY, DRUNK HALLUCINATIONS!!"


 * The audience laughs*

"I want you, like Uncle Sam."

"HOLY SH*T, I'M GOING CRAZY!! I DON'T WANNA SEE THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE!!!!"


 * The audience laughs*

Anyways, I was horrified, if I had pants, I would crap in them.


 * The audience laughs*

"NO! I don't wanna be a factory worker!!"


 * The audience laughs*

"I want you to help."

"Oh. Am I drunk?"

"Yes."

"No wonder I see flying cows."


 * The audience laughs*

"I want you as a member of a crew.

"Uhhhhhhh..."

I was drooling like Patrick on SpongeBob SquarePants.


 * The audience laughs*

I was afraid, so I accepted. At first, I thought I was gonna work in Hell, but no, I basically wrote in a real life Death Note. That's what it's called, right? I'm not sure, just because I was built in China doesn't mean I know that crap.


 * The audience laughs* 